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New York City
June 2003

In Praise Of Parents: It’s Tradition!
by Dr. Carole G. Hankin with Randi T. Sachs

This month and last month, we honor the most important people in a child’s life: mom and dad. Many of us follow long-time traditions on how to spend the day. If you are the parent of a child you may have challenge of maintaining traditions you’ve kept in honoring your own parents and helping your children become involved in their owns traditions of showing their own appreciation.

But at this time of year, it’s also worthwhile to look at how some traditions in parenting have changed, and how these changes have helped to improve the lives of all family members. It’s also important to acknowledge that traditional roles of “mom” and “dad” can be successfully filled in all types of families.

“Traditionally,” it’s the mother who has primary responsibility for managing the children’s lives. She maintains the balance between time spent on schoolwork, family time, social activities, and outside interests such as sports, music lessons, religion, and more. But progress is definitely being made to include Dad in the planning and the management of the varied lives we all lead as family members. It’s no longer unusual to have fathers attend PTA meetings and to make sure they are present at all teacher conferences. Fathers are getting and staying involved in their children’s lives. Many years ago, it was notable that my husband was the “class father,” but today he would probably not be the only dad serving cupcakes at the holiday party.

As parents, you are your children’s first and ever-constant teachers. You teach your children actively by reading with them, helping with schoolwork, taking them with you on daily errands, and giving them cultural and educational experiences such as travel, museums, zoos, and even family gatherings. By example, you teach your children how to behave, how to interact with others, the values and beliefs you hold, and the expectations and hopes that you have for them and their futures.

It’s certainly not easy to be a parent today. It seems that our children are continually facing tough choices and having to learn and absorb so much information. We can’t know the answers to everything, but we can provide the one thing that has proved the test of time. Parents love their children, and by expressing and demonstrating that love through both word and action we give our children the strength and support they need to grow and make their own decisions. Parents know that the love they have for their children is incomparable to any other bond. How many times have you looked at your child and thought, “Can he possibly know how much I love him?” I don’t think children really can understand. That is, not until they become parents themselves. As a grandmother of seven, I’ve seen the love come full circle.#

Dr. Hankin is superintendent of Syosset Central School District. Randi Sachs is Public Information Officer of Syosset Schools.

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