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June 2001
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1997-2000
 
New York City
July 2002

From the Superintendent’s Seat 
Building Self Esteem Is Important For All Children
By Dr. Carole G. Hankin with Randi T. Sachs

By age nine or 10, children begin to take more notice if a classmate looks, acts, or dresses differently. As much as parents and teachers would like to protect all children from being hurt, we need to first teach them why it is wrong to view differences in others as negative, and also to teach them how (and if) to respond, if they are the subject of an attack, either verbal or physical. One way to make an impression is to have the children observe this type of behavior in a controlled setting, and then discuss how they feel about it.

In Syosset, we have a program that brings together high school students to serve as role models for all of our districts’ third grade students. “Peer Educators,” are high school students selected for this program. They undergo training on interacting with the younger students for the first half of the year, and then visit each of the classes several times in the spring to implement their lessons on “anti-bullying and anti-aggressiveness.” One of the most popular methods they have used over the past several years is to put on skits for the children to get their message across. This year, they tried another approach to teaching the children about respecting themselves and one another. The Peer Educators helped the younger children to produce a musical production of their own with a very strong message. The play gave the children very concrete examples on why name-calling is hurtful, but even more importantly, gave them strategies for handling these types of situations should they arise.

The play is meant to teach children to appreciate differences in others and to accept that different does not mean worse. When one group of children declares another group to be “nerds” the response they receive is quite disappointing. Instead of getting upset, the second group of children simply responds with matter-of-fact answers or attempts to turn the conversation away from criticizing and steer the others toward accepting one another, even making jokes to try to cool down hot tempers.

Not only are the children not devastated by the rejection of the others, but they also demonstrate that they feel good about themselves and that they have their own unique qualities. Song and dance numbers in the production give each student the opportunity to take center stage and to show that there are many different ways to be “cool.”

There’s something about a production like this that transcends even the message it so bluntly delivers. It requires cooperation, teamwork, and a willingness to take a little risk by appearing on stage. The students all clearly felt good about the job they did, and they received the applause and appreciation of the second and first graders who were the lucky audience members.

Most experts agree that one reason children will bully others is because they lack enough self esteem to feel good about themselves without picking on someone who is smaller or has less defenses. Through these kinds of programs we can reach out to young children and show them that each and every one of them has tremendous self worth for who they are. Teachers report that it works. They have found that there is better harmony in their classes after meeting with the high school students.#

Dr. Hankin is the Superintendent of the Syosset School District in Long Island.

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Education Update, Inc., P.O. Box 20005, New York, NY 10001.
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All material is copyrighted and may not be printed without express consent of the publisher. © 2002.


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