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SEPTEMBER 2004

From the Superintendent's Seat
Give Your Child an A for Attitude
by Dr. Carole G. Hankin with Randi T. Sachs

We all remember the classmates from our childhood who seemed to be able to do it all. Were they the best looking...the most athletic...the smartest? Sure, the kids with these gifts stood out. But weren't there also kids who succeeded because they were given a different "gift" from their parents? They were given a "can do" attitude.

Imbue your children with high self-esteem and the confidence that they can reach their goals and you will be rewarded with children who succeed in school academically and socially and who welcome new challenges in the classroom as the opportunity to learn that they are. This is one area in which your influence as a parent can make a tremendous impact.

Unfortunately, it's remarkable how many parents actually undermine their own child's confidence without intending to do so. They let their own doubts come to the surface and even worry that they are building "false confidence," but there's really little danger in that. Don't worry that you are building your child up too much for a let down. Remember, there are plenty of people out there who will provide a negative influence for your child. Your own family does not need to be part of that group. Believe in your children's abilities and they will carry that with them for life.

Your family, whether it has two members, four members, or more, can be an unabashed cheering squad for each of its members. This includes siblings. Despite the inevitable existence of sibling rivalry, don't allow your children to criticize or ridicule one another for trying something new. Encourage them to bolster one another and to help when they can. As the new school year begins, this is the time you can give your children the boost of confidence they need to make it their best year yet.

One of the strongest ways you can help your children build self-esteem is to help them identify and pursue their own special talents. Recognize that what is special for your child may not be a talent that is easily showcased on the athletic field or on the stage. If your child is an avid reader, give him or her just as much praise for enjoying books as you would give for hitting a home run. If your child's friendly personality is what makes him or her so special, you may be able to help find an age-appropriate volunteer experience that will be very rewarding.

Good luck getting your children off to a positive start of a new school year. September is the time for new beginnings and new opportunities to succeed. Start your children off with an A for Attitude.#

Dr. Hankin is superintendent of Syosset Central School District. Randi Sachs is Public Information Officer of Syosset Schools.

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